Tuesday, 28 July 2009

Bikini shmikini

Okay, I didn't realise that posting those photos would create such a response about my 'bikini body'. Truth be told, I only bought one bikini for the holiday and didn't really intend wearing it since buying it was traumatic enough - all those wobbly bits in the badly lit changing rooms - eugh. However, the heat was such that I couldn't bear the swimming costumes any more and had to resort to the two piece.

Putting on the bikini and trying not to look at my muffin middle and love handles, I remembered how I used to wear tiny bikinis on holiday with no self consciousness at all. It just confirmed what I'd been thinking for the past year or so. I've been lamenting my loss of fitness and my expanding waistline, but just hiding behind what my mum calls "deceptive dressing".

Before daughter was born I was a slim size 10/12 and went to the gym five times a week doing a variety of different forms of exercise (Bodycombat was my favourite). I was the slimmist and fittest I'd ever been in my life.

After she was born, I did lose the baby weight quite quickly (thanks to breastfeeding) and this led me into a false sense of security. My guard was down.

Unfortunately, working full time with a baby left no time for the gym so that had to go. Then we moved house and I was so deeply depressed at moving to this wreck that the healthy eating was replaced by bad habits. Cakes and biscuits, takeaways, nibbles with the odd glass of wine and of course, hiding chocolate under the bed, were my ways of dealing with the stress of renovating this place. Gradually the weight crept on.

Now the size 12 clothes are getting tight and I'm about a stone over my ideal weight. Something has to be done.

The break in Menorca has given me the impetus to change and since returning home I have been eating healthily again, feeling much better and I am hoping to get out and about more to improve my fitness. (I've also bought husband "Wii Fit" for his birthday with the ulterior motive of using it myself!)

I'm determined to lose one or two pounds a week until my birthday in September, by which time I should feel more like my old self again. I can feel a butterfly struggling to emerge from the chrysalis ..........

15 comments:

gigi said...

Life happens to us all :)
Just starting that same plan myself, again! I'll do it again and again and again until I die. At least it gives me something to live for. You look great and look so happy in those pictures!

Maggie May said...

Now if I was to put on a bikini, then you'd see what a dumpling/ doughnut middle really looked like.

Really, I think you have a lovely figure!

ModernMom said...

I thought you looked fab!

The wife of bold said...

snap, i can't believe you hide chocolate under the bed too ha. Good lucj on your healthy eating plan, i try but fail every day as i have zero will power.

Kelloggsville said...

aha - 'chocolate under the bed' - the elixir of stress!!!! - my shameful secret is to have chocolate after I've done my teeth so I can taste it until I fall asleep - I know it's not good but it feels soooooooo good.

lose too much weigh and you'll lose those boobs!!! As you seem to say: get fit not necessarily thin

good luck !

Really Rachel said...

Good to see you back! I'm just catching up on your last few posts. The holiday looks great! Best of luck with your fitness regime. It's hard to keep up the willpower, isn't it. We'll expect regular updates :o)

scrappysue said...

who said anything about being pregnant? we ALL think you look fabulous, so take a bow. if you want to shed a few pounds, then we're right there with you on that too.

the ONE thing that suffers when one is a 'working mum' is the exercise. i've learned that first hand this year...

scrappysue said...

one more thing - what date in september???

Expat mum said...

Better to do it now because it gets harder and harder to do it as you age! Agh! I read recently that women in their mid-forties need about 500 calories less than they used too. That's a lot of calories and I'm rather hoping it's not true.

MikeH said...

I know what you mean. I haven't worn a bikini since my kids were born, either -- not outside, anyway ;)

Nice holiday snaps!

Working Mum said...

Gigi - you're right. It's life. But I don't feel great at the moment, so I need to get healthier.

Maggie May - I think muffin middles are inevitable after giving birth, I just want mine to be a small cupcake size, not a supersize blueberry with cream cheese!

Kelloggsville - I am truly shocked!

Really Rachel - I thought if I put it on my blog and gave weekly updates it would motivate me more to stick to my plan. We'll see....

Wife of Bold - I think there are many women hiding chocolate under the bed - my hairdresser uses a drawer in her bedside cabinet for her staff of chocolate and sweets!

Scrappy Sue - it's the 18th, more about that later.......

MikeH - and I'm sure you looked fabulous in it, too!

Expat Mum - I really hope that isn't true as well; how would I cope without my breaktime fix of chocolate digestives?!

rosiero said...

Judging from the photos you do not have much to worry about. So glad you had a great holiday - it certainly helps to get away from the stresses of home.

Moannie said...

I was looking through some old photos [for inspiration] and found one taken when my kids were 3 7 and 11 and there I was in a pink bikini looking 'the business' and yet I remember being selfconsious of my body...three kids and I look fab. [I can say it now without false modesty] but nothing anyone said then would make me believe I didn't have fat thighs, and bulging tum etc.
It's a woman thing, you look great...honestly...believe it NOW and enjoy, before the droop sets in for good.

Working Mum said...

Moannie - thank you for your wise words. I think it's more about how I feel and I need to feel fit and healthy again and I guess caryying an extra stone around is making me feel worse. It must be a woman thing!

Reluctant Housewife said...

I've never worn a bikini, heat wave or no.

I thought you looked great in yours. Feeling healthy is always an individual thing, though. So good luck with it.