Sunday, 7 June 2009

Cracking Idea Gromit?

When daughter asks Daddy to play with her, he does. He goes all out building lego cities, racing crash cars, making elaborate railways, playing Buckaroo, etc. Outside he makes fantastic obstacle courses for her, sets up the welly wanging course and goes wading in the brook outside our house. He doesn't see the washing, dust, ironing, dishes, gardening, etc around him. He gives her his full attention.

When daughter asks me to play it's usually:

"In a minute"

"When I've put the washing in"

"When I've pegged the washing out"

"When the dinner's in the oven"

"When I've hoovered the lounge"

I hadn't realised how she felt about this until our recent trip to the Science Museum.

In the Wallace and Gromit Cracking Ideas exhibition children were encouraged to think of their own inventions, draw them on a piece of paper and send them to Wallace.

This was daughter's invention:

The Attentioner

Notice the 'prodder' for getting mummy's attention and the 'grabber' for getting hold of her and bringing her to daughter?

Now I've got another thing to feel guilty about!


27 comments:

Strictly said...

Oh kids, they always give you the guilts!

Coding Mamma (Tasha) said...

Sounds very familiar. Don't feel guilty! Take action. Get hubby to do the cooking, ironing or hoovering, while you play with your daughter for half an hour. See if you can get him to take over one or more of the daily tasks, so that you can get a solid half hour a day in. I'm sure it will make a difference.

Fat, frumpy and fifty... said...

questions, questions.....she is such a darling ..!!

Kelloggsville said...

ahhhh, ye olde 'gilt trip': given to parents down countless generations! If you played with her full attention everytime she asked, you would have a spoilt brat that didn't know that there was a world outside of her. It's your job to find the balance that works and she will always want more - you wouldn't feed her sweets every meal if she asked for them - I believe too much 100% attention is the same as sweets (but maybe that's just the working mum in me!!) - cool invention though ;0)

Dusty Spider said...

Oh they can do it to you every time can't they! Don't feel too guilty. It's not a bad lesson to learn that her people don't all jump to her whim. She'll still love you to bits. Always. xxxxx

rosiero said...

A mother's lot, I'm afraid. Too much to do and not enough time to do it in!

ModernMom said...

Ahh Mommy guilt. It comes with the territory:) On the plus side she is an amazing artist!

Maggie May said...

I have noticed that I do the same with the granddaughters and Grandpa leaves everything and does whatever is commanded of him! Well someone has to do some work!
Yes, it can make you feel guilty!

That Girl said...

Argh this sounds so familiar! Every week I think Must Try Harder and sometimes I succeed... but mostly not! But at least we all have clean pants to wear on my shift! Don't feel guilty - a million mums must do it!

rosiescribble said...

Me too, my daughter would love one of those!

bekimarie said...

You have to give them a go, forget the diet 'hehe'!
I agree with kellogsville about too much attention and i'm not even a working Mum so you shouldn't feel guilty.
You could have a future inventor on your hands though.
Take care
((hugs))
Beki xxx

Mrs OMG Pregnant said...

Ahh, but what you have failed to say is without all that, she would never have had the inspiration to create that SOOOO you inspire your daughter. How cool is that!!!!!

Mum's the word said...

Hello,
Kept meaning to add you to my list, as I've been dipping in and out of your blog for a while and really enjoy it.
Thanks for reading mine.
By the way, I'm from London and have been able to find my way back here after a hiatus.
I think I may take my 5 year old on your tour, it sounds really good.
x jo

Kate said...

Hang in there. It's funny because this very evening I was feeling guilty over the same exact thing after one of my 3 year olds decided to wedge herself between me and the cabinet below the cooktop while I was cooking dinner. I asked if she was wanting attention and she said YES! I had to answer "as soon as I finish cooking dinner." Hang in there!

Working Mum said...

Strictly - isn't it always the way?

Tasha - husband does do housework, but mostly when daughter is in bed (washing dishes, ironing, etc). I think he is making up for being at work a lot of the time by spending quality time with her and I can't really complain about that.

Kelloggsville & Dusty Spider - thank you for reminding me of that, yes, she would be a spoilt brat if I gave her my attention all the time. A friend once said, "You don't spoil children by giving them things, you spoil them by giving them what they want whenever they want it"

Rosiero - I think it is definitely a working mum's lot; I have to fit all the housework in when I'm not at work, ie, when daughter is around.

Maggie May - you are right! That is exactly what happens when we go to my parents'. My dad plays with her while me and my mum cook dinner!

That Girl - thanks for popping in. You are right, I should be proud of the fact that everything in the house runs smoothly because of me.

Bekimarie - I think she is an inventor. On Saturday she drew plans for a board to attach to Tesco trolleys for children to stand on so they don't have to walk round the supermarket. She wants me to send it to Tescos so they can make some. Watch this space .......

Mrs OMG Pregnant - I will take all the credit for any of her future inventions!

Mum's the Word - glad you liked my tour, just make sure you can stand 7 hours in the science museum. I was flagging, and I'm a scientist!

Kate - thanks for letting me know I'm not the only one.

Moannie said...

Sadly, guilt is a word that goes with mother-hood. Coding Mamma has a practical solution-but there will always be something to tickle our guilt switch.

A Modern Mother said...

I've been told thatI'm a rubbish reader and that daddy is much better!

Suburbia said...

It's great that they can articulate the whole thing though isn't it? Despite the guilt trip.

I have the same problem, they will always remember me as the one busy in the kitchen and dad as the one who has time, but seeing as no one else does the cooking etc then there doesn't seem to be a solution. Do I sound a bit bitter about it?!!!

Jacki said...

Don't feel guilty...we moms all go through the same thing...Dads are for playing, and Moms do all the work. :-)

(Very) Lost in France said...

Oh blimey.. the joys of motherhood eh? It's just one big guilt trip! Clever little thing to come up with such a useful invention though. VLiF

becomingkate said...

That is too cute!

Mummy Cow said...

Little E wants to know if Izzie has patented this invention, because it is just what she needs...
MC (also drowning in guilt!)x

Iota said...

You should get a patent application in on that quick, before someone steals the idea and goes into production.

I think it is good for kids to know they are not always top priority. The world doesn't revolve round them, and they're going to have to find that out one way or another, sooner or later.

But I am horribly guilty of the "in 2 minutes" line, so that's probably just me trying to assuage my own guilt.

scrappysue said...

she still seems pretty happy about it tho!!!

Maternal Tales said...

Oh darling - that is so us...Exactly the same in our house. Girls ask Mummy for attention and all they get is 'In a minute'...I get quite sad about it sometimes. And then when Daddy plays it's, just as you say, playing with abandon without a thought for anything else. I dread to think what the house would look like if they were all left on their own for a week! I have the added problem that their Daddy is away such a lot that when he's home he makes an extra special effort with them, so when he's gone they expect me to do the same as him. Not an easy precedent for him to have set. Love your daughter's picture though...but don't feel guilty. It's the same everywhere!

Catharine Withenay said...

I'm with you all the way. If my daughter could draw as well as yours, she'd have done exactly the same. Gosh - parental guilt is awful!

Polly said...

Well at least she has a great imagination. Truly can relate though poor Ollie seems to be put off all the time for one reason or another. I will try better to play with him more.