Sunday, 11 January 2009

Reasons to stay in

A bit like A Confused Take That Fan, I tried to go out last night. It's not often husband and I get to go out together, but we were invited to a dear friend's surprise 40th birthday meal and wanted to go.

Now, the meal was quite early and in the middle of Chester, a good 40 min drive, so we had to set off at 5pm.

We asked MIL to babysit and of course, because of the timing, offered to make her dinner: shepherd's pie with carrots and broccoli, which I spent an hour preparing.

Why is it, when I'm going out for a meal, I still have to make the evening meal for whoever is at home?

Anyway, we managed to get to the meal on time, and had a lovely evening.

Then we arrived back at 11pm to ...........................

................... a kitchen of dirty dishes!

Now, I know she was doing us a favour by babysitting for us (and swapping a night watching TV in her house for a night watching TV in our house) but she did get a homecooked meal thrown in; is it too much to ask that she wash the dishes? My mum would have. My friends' mums would have! When my friend's daughter babysits she washes the dishes!! Am I being unreasonable?

Apparently not because even husband commented on it this time!

Not only that, she had not used the milk in the fridge for daughter's bedtime drink, she had opened the slowly defrosting carton of milk which was sitting on the worktop and then returned it, side down, to the worktop where it had continued to defrost and leaked everywhere!

Major clean up required!

I don't think I'll bother going out any more.


Ladybird World Mother said...

I just SO know this one. Gone are the days of spending an hour getting ready... now its a two and a half minute scrub in bath, throw on clothes (oh, that'll do type thing) wipe make up on, take it off, try again, (that'll do type thing) Race downstairs. Hi to babysitter. Tell them in 3 minutes where all the food is. Leave an immaculate house. Come back, knackered, to Bomb Site.
Hope you get to go out soon... and come back to Nice Clean Kitchen.

Maggie May said...

Oh dear..... I would have washed up. Most people would have, I think. You are not being unreasonable.
Count to one hundred and take an aspirin! LOL!

Susanna (A Modern Mother) said...

Very annoying, I hope it doesn't stop you from going out again though. Next time you could try a Tesco meal, less dishes.

Fat, frumpy and fifty... said...

didnt you have a similar experience a while back when tryong top get out to the choir practice...MIL are a law unto themselves....

I'm at work and mine is popping in for her annual cuppa with us...(she is onlt 7 miles away, I confess I saw her more often when we lived 400 miles away)I amy overlap and she may still be there when I get in...dang!!

Mean Mom said...

Well, that's just wrong. Next time, she'll just have to go hungry. ;0)

Not really - next time, do as Susanna suggests and buy her a ready meal.

cheshire wife said...

You are right to be annoyed. If there is a next time, I would casually point out where you keep the washing up liquid and tea towels.

Suburbia said...

You are so right! It is a pain in the neck having to cook for everyone else even when you are going out to eat. Sort of ruins it really!

I can't believe she didn't clear up though.

The Guider said...

Wow! Well, my mum doesn't babysit as she lives 6.5 hours away. My MIL doesn't babysit as we don't trust them to look after the kids since the day they let 2 year old Cheeky play with a cordless drill then accused us of over-reacting when we got upset. But when my friends babysit, they just get a sandwich and a drink. Some wash up, some don't.

auntiegwen said...

I teach a babysitting course for our 6th formers. One of the things I tell them is if they make a drink or have a snack, make sure they wash up after themselves.

Anonymous said...

Having heard these tales a time or two I have often thought back to when we lived in Canada. We were amazed to find that ther were a network of babysitting businesses which had the mature woman on their books...we called the service, booked the time and granny would arrive, listen carefully, send us on our way and we would return to a tranquil house, sleeping babes and a clean and tidy kitchen. Might be a good idea for a little business here.

blogthatmama said...

Or get a Pizza she dirty in her own house, I wonder?

The Dotterel said...

And leave her paper plates and plastic knife and fork!

Catharine Withenay said...

Hello! The Dotterel sent me here to learn about Manchester. Is this what MILs do there? Mine has always seemed quite reasonable to date and I would hate to think our impending move would throw her off course!

Given the credit crunch, they say that staying-in is the new going-out. Or perhaps your friends could postpone their 40th birthdays until after the recession?

rosiero said...

What a shame. I bet that took the edge off the evening out. My mum would have washed up and probably tidied up the whole house in the bargain!

Jacki said...

I am thankful for my mom...when she comes over for even just a visit, she will help with housework. :-)

Reluctant Housewife said...

Oh no! That was not very thoughtful (to put it in Enormous Understatement terms). I'm sorry that that happened and kind of ruined your nice evening out!

Working mum said...

LWM - Yep, it was an hour making tea and 15 mins to get ready. Why do I do that?

FFF - yes, and every week when I had physitherapy. Why am I surprised?

Maggie May - I'm sure you would have washed up, most people would

Susannah - I'll have to become acquainted with ready meals, and MIL would have to become acquainted with the microwave or oven!

Mean Mom - the trouble is, I needed to feed daughter and I can't give her a decent meal and not MIL, just can't do it.

Cheshire Wife - I love the idea of pointing out the washing up liquid, think I'll have to point out the sink as well, though!

Suburbia - actually, husband did offer to cook something for them, now I think of it. Next time I'll take him up on the offer.

AG - a babysitting course. Brilliant. Can I enrol MIL on it?

Moannie - what a fab idea! How about starting one?

The Guider - cordless drill?!!

The Dotterel - I think I could dig out some paper Thomas the Tank Engine plates, would they do?

blogthatmama - she has a cleaner two hours a week, she thinks that is sufficient!

Catharine - please don't judge all Manchester MILs by mine's standards. And don't judge all Manchester mums by mine!

Rosiero and Jackie - yep, my mum would have done some ironing while she was here!

Reluctant - that's the thing - I don't think she does think, I don't think it's intentional, she just doesn't think to wash up! Odd!